Prom - 12:26 pm - 28-06-2006
Last night was my prom, one of the most looked-forward-to night of the year. Here’s what happened:
Getting Ready
At around 5 o clock, I decided to head around to Glyn’s to get ready. I collected all my stuff together and set off. By the time I was at the Yeung Sing, I realised I had forgotten my outfit, so I had to walk back all the way home again.
I arrived at Glyn’s and waited for him to do his hair before we both popped over to Dave’s to pick something up. On the way back, Pete appeared in his car. He gave us a lift back to Glyn’s and he joined us.
At Glyn’s my mother and sister had arrived to see me in my outfit. Myself, Pete and Glyn went upstairs to get ready. It took me ages to get everything on. Wearing Highland Wear is a big effort. Here is my clothing inventory:
1 x Kilt
1 x Jacket
1 x Waist-coat
1 x Shirt
2 x Cufflinks
1 x Bow-tie
1 x Belt
1 x Sporan
2 x Sporan-Belt Connecter
2 x Socks
2 x Shoes
2 x Flashes
1 x Skean-Due
I finally finished getting ready and went downstairs for photos.
After a few photos we set off for the bus stop. We walked past a few limos speeding down the road, at £20 per person and felt pleased to know that we’d be spending £1 for our journey.
Getting There
When we got on the bus and asked for our child singles to town the bus driver gave us a dodgey look. For some reason he didn’t seem to believe us that we were in fact 15. Crazy.
When people got onto the bus they chose to sit next to people they didn’t know rather than sit near us. Maybe I was just being paranoid.
We got off the bus at Friar Lane and walked up to the Brittania. We all popped into the toilet before descending the stairs to meet everyone.
Getting Started
We stood around for about half an hour talking to people and congratulating people on how good they looked. I was amazed to see that absolutely everyone looked good. Not to seem harsh or anything but I did expect some people to look completely appalling.
A lot of people chose to point out that Martin Rose was also in a kilt. I was tempted to point out who else was in a suit or dress. I decided against it.
Finally we were allowed in to eat. The vegetarian option was really nice, but the chicken didn’t look appetising.
After dinner all the awards were announced. I cannot remember them all but here are a few:
Pete- Best Male Ass
John Gunstone- Most Genuine Male
Sophie- Female Most Likely to Be a Millionaire
Elliot- Male Most Likely to Be a Millionaire
After that myself, Pete, Glyn, Charlotte and G went out.
Getting Alcohol
We all left the hotel and Pete and Glyn went to Spar while Charlotte, G and myself went up the road so Charlotte could have a fag. After she’d finished they both went back in and I went to meet Glyn and Pete.
They were quite a way away, so I had to walk alone through Nottingham wearing a kilt. It was a new experience.
One bloke lifted my kilt up to see if I was wearing underwear, many bouncers glared at me and one drunken man shouted at me in a fake Scottish accent.
When I finally arrived at Spar I was very relieved.
The lovely people at Spar had asked Glyn for ID and he wasn’t keen on using his fake one, because they scan it.
We considered walking to a bar but decided against it. Instead we walked back to the hotel and swigged Spiced Rum in the toilets. Classy stuff.
Getting into the Swing of It
The next part of the night was split into getting water, dancing, mingling with people. Very little happened but it was very enjoyable. We heard that Ollie Marshall had been served with a Fake-ID so we went up to the bar and Glyn got a pint of Foster’s for each of us.
Glyn then went back to get another couple but this time he was not served. He told the barman that he was a teacher but he wasn’t believed. Then Miss Fitzgibbon started backing Glyn up, saying that he taught Law. He failed in getting any alcohol, but Miss bought him a pint with Matt Allcock’s money. Lucky for some…
Getting More Drunk
After a while we decided to have more Spiced Rum. We could no longer get into the toilets we were in before, but we did find a conference room. Glyn stood at the auditorium and made a speech. It was fairly incoherent.
We returned to see everyone else. Glyn took my camera and took an obscene number of pictures of himself with various people.
Getting Back
As the prom drew to a close we decided to go to the Ye Olde Trip to Jerusalem. Unfortunately it was closed, so we headed back to the bus stop. I got really hungry so I went to Subway and bought a foot-long Veggie Delight with 3 oatmeal and raisin cookies.
The bus arrived and we all piled in. It was very very crowed. Judith borrowed my camera and took a few photos. Callum was playing his DS Lite.
We arrived back in Bingham and went to Honey’s. Little was going on at Honey’s and we were all quite tired so we left shortly after.
On the way back we came across a large group of people from our year hanging around outside Sophie Bullock’s house.
We sat down on the road and talked for a bit. Nothing of interest happened. So Glyn, Pete, G and I all went back to my house.
We got into bed at 2 and woke 12 hours later.
Click here to view the photos
The Secret Garden
Glyn organised a get-together at his house. Through some kind of mis-understanding many people thought it was a party and thus expected more than they received.
When I arrived the only people there were Glyn, John and Moreland. John excitedly told me about a Secret Garden. He made me follow him out of Glyn’s garden onto the main road. He took me to a house which was “For Sale“. It was a semi-detatched and the ajoining house was occupied.
We went into the back garden which was like a crazy jungle-maze. I have to admit that it was pretty cool but I was slightly nervous about the whole affair. We returned to the house.
Fallen Idle,Beer Towers and Outrageous Flirting
When we got back Pete had arrived and had let Jordan in, along with two of Glyn’s ex-girlfriend’s friends, Abby and Natty. After a short while SFFI arrived and dropped a copy of the Evening Post. In it was a review of Fallen Idle’s EP. It wasn’t flattering.
As Abby and Natty were the only girls there, manye people were accused of wanting them. It was pretty clear who did want one of them though. With his outrageous flirting, many people were commenting on it, much to his and her embarrassment.
While all this was happening, a tower of beer bottles and cans was being constructed. Check the photos to see it.
Abuse
Sam arrived and decided to abuse Abby and, to a lesser extent, Natty. He is surprisingly influential so a lot of other people joined him.
Moreland who was clearly quite drunk started rapping about Abby. One line that stood out was:
“Abby, she’s really shabby“
He also shouted at her in a very sarcastic tone that she was “a really cool person“.
Next Door
By around 12, the next door neighbour, Alan, got quite annoyed. He came out of the house and got quite angry, saying that he put up with it last week but he wouldn’t again.
Schmitt stood up and walked over to him and told him to watch his manners and that he needn’t be so aggressive. Schmitt told us all to go inside, and being the leader he is, he was obeyed.
Bingham
We then decided to go for a walk into Bingham to get some food. We left the house and one of us noticed a face in the window.
Glyn’s next door neighbour, Alan, was in the window of his house with all the lights off glaring at us. Everyone was in a mixed state of fear and hilarity.
SFFI, Mikey and Pete were playing football in the streets and Mikey managed to boot it into someone’s garden. They walked around precautiously while me and Sam shouted at them through the fence.
After that we decided to stop off at the Secret Garden as a few of us hadn’t seen it yet. In the dark the garden was much more frightening than before. We left eagerly.
We went into Bingham and got a Chinese take-away and then back to Glyn’s.
Homeward Bound
When we got back we heard that Moreland had thrown up on Glyn’s bed and had locked himself in the bathroom.
Natty was saying that Abby and herself had nowhere to stay. She asked me where I was staying. I said “My house.” She smiled at me expectedly. “You can too if you want” I said. She said she might. I was generally quite confused.
After a short time of photographing people and having to put up with Sam playing the guitar we set off home. Sam told the girls to follow us so we could take them to the Secret Garden to sleep.
The four of us left. For some unknown reason Abby and Natty stood outside Glyn’s house talking. We continued to walk to my house, they showed no sign of following. We turned the corner and they were out of sight, eventually they came around the corner and we could see them again, Sam pointed at the abandoned house and shouted “That’s the Secret Garden, have a good sleep“. We walked home
Epilogue
This morning when I rang John, I was informed that the girls were intending to sleep at my house and that they were a tad pissed off with me and Sam, claiming we were mean to them. Oh dear.
Click here to view the photos
Saturday I went to Heather’s BBQ/Party. The day was really enjoyable, but there isn’t much to say about it. There are however lots of nice photos.
Click here to view the photos
Colours - 5:47 pm - 23-06-2006
DLPWD got hacked today, leaving this on Dave’s homepage. As a result Dave has had to remove the style sheet from all the blogs as a temporary precaution. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Here is a letter I found here.
“
Why Can’t I Own a Canadian?
October 2002
Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It’s funny, as well as informative:
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:
When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians?
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don’t agree. Can you settle this?
Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.
Your devoted fan,
Jim
Dave’s trying to convince me that he’s Sherlock and that I’m Watson. This is clearly bull. As Schmitt pointed out, Holmes is tall and Watson is average height, therefore…
Well anyway, if Dave tells you that he’s Holmes be sure to ignore him.
Friday I got in touch with Sam to see what he was up to. He said he was free so we arranged to meet up. We also called on Grace who was with Pete. The four of us just hung out together. We went to the Linear and Cogley. Later in the evening on the way home myself and Sam met with Cherry and Sinead. It didn’t appear like they had much fun.
One particularily memorable event was a conversation between Pete and Sam. It went something like this:
“Do you believe in capital punishment, Sam?“
“I believe it exists.“
“Oh, I’m a synic myself.” Pete replied sarcastically.
“Do you mean, do I support capital punishment?” Sam asked dryly.
“Yes, do you?“
“Yeah. I believe in on site capital punishment. In fact I believe in on site mutilation. So if a kid steals something their punishment is to be made into a hat which their parents must wear for nine years. And if the hat rots then the parents need to make a new hat out of their own scalp. That’ll teach them to raise a law breaking brat.“
“So you don’t then?“
“No.“
I was also reminded of my throne
Click here to view the photos.
Originally I had planned to go to the Linear Bridge, like had become customary on a Thursday but then Dave invited me to a party. He wasn’t sure whether it was on, and told me he’d text me at 1100 in the morning to say. Thus began my confusion.
The Confusion
I hadn’t received a text at 11. I went home and rang him. He didn’t reply. I rang him some more. No reply. At 1800ish he rang me up to say that he didn’t know whether the party was on or not and that he’d ring after the match. I todl him not to ring me between 1900 and 1930 as I’d be in my dance lesson. At around 1945, he rang me to say that he was in town and that I should catch the 2000 bus. I then received a text saying that I should catch the 2030 bus as he would be walking from town. I received another text saying he would be late in meeting me. Unfortunately, I had no credit so I was relying on him entirely.
The Journey
The bus was late. It didn’t arrive until 1948. It was also a Radcliffe Line, not an Xpress. This meant that my journey would be longer.
At the first stop after the one I got on, the brother and girlfriend of the driver hauled the bus down. The driver’s brother eagerly showed the his brother his new trainers. They also discussed plans to go clubbing in town. Finally, the brother left and his girlfriend paid the fare.
Throughout the whole trip they would discuss plans for the evening and whatnot. It was fairly interesting. If I had to say who my favourite bus driver was, I would definately chose him.
Dave rang me up a few times to ask where I was. I had been quite delayed. One call he told me that the party was indeed off so we’d be going to a bar. He also told me to get off at the “third stop after the little bridge” and that he would meet me there.
I crossed the bridge. I went past one stop. I went past another stop. I pressed the stop button. He pulled up at the third stop, which was in the middle of a residential road. No one was there.
It dawned on me.
“If this bus had been an Xpress, which would the third stop after the bridge have been?” I asked the driver. He gave me directions.
I began walking past all the houses onto the main road. No one was at any of the stops. I started to need the toilet.
I had no credit to ring Dave. I didn’t know where he was. I needed the toilet. I didn’t know where one would be. All in all, I was fed up.
I decided to walk towards Trent Bridge, as Dave had said the bar was in that area. I went by the canal, and was able to urinate in a hedge. Dave rang and I told him to meet me at McDonalds.
All problems were solved.
The Bar
Myself and Dave arrived at the bar. Jake was there, along with some people I didn’t know. I had no money so Dave paid for a pint for me. We went and bought them, the barman used to go to our school but he clearly didn’t recognise me.
We sat around drinking for a while. Dave called me Comeback-McAsh repeatedly. We generally had a good time.
We later went for a short walk and they set off for home.
We couldn’t find a bus stop that went the right way so we rang Dave’s dad to see if he could pick us up. Then in the distance I saw the bus.
“Dave, is that the bus?“
“Shit, I think it is. RUN!“
That was the general gist of it. I can’t explain how amazing it was. Trust me, it was.
Click here to view the photos
We had a science exam on Wednesday. Afterwards Suzi and John had nothing to do so we went back to my house.
My House
We got back to my house and sat in my room chatting for a while. We decided that as it was so hot we should go in the pool. As we were getting changed I suggested the idea of going in the sauna first. This idea went down very well. I dashed downstairs and turned it on to warm up.
I found my camera to take some photos of everyone. Suzi tried to hide, so I ended up taking quite a few photos of the back of her head.
We went into the sauna. Suzi barely broke a sweat. John almost drowned us. Boiling hot, we dashed into the pool. We played Marco-Polo which was a good laugh. We then got out and put the cover back on the pool and started getting dry.
We never managed to finish this goal as our curiosity got the better of us and we experimented with lying on the pool cover.
Eventually we all got dried, had showers and enjoyed a simple but delicious lunch of bread and brie.
Success!
Click here to view the photos.
Happy Birthday Paul, you’re 64 today.
If you fancy it, check out this website. It’s a French site with lots of different (and occasionally very strange) versions of the song.
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